Sunday, July 13, 2008

Question. . .

I am 13 weeks pregnant and I look a little more like 23. I accept that and I know it better than anyone because I have to see myself every day. : )  I cut myself LOTS of slack because not only is this one my 4th child, my 3rd child was a mere 4 months old when we conceived this one. Obviously my body had not gotten back to its pre-pregnancy condition in that short amount of time. I know there are women out there who either work their tails off and get their baby weight off in a matter of weeks, and there are the ones who don't work at it and still get it off in weeks--I am neither of those. : )  So here is my question---what is it with the women out there who have HAD CHILDREN themselves and been in this vulnerable state and feel it is okay to say things like, "How far along are you? (jaw drops when I respond "12 weeks" and they continue) "Whoa! You're going to have a BIG baby!!"  I smile and politely say, "Yes, I do actually tend to have bigger babies (my largest was 9 pounds, smallest was 8), but what you are seeing is a lot of leftover fat from my previous pregnancy." Still smiling. Fighting urge to confront her and say, "How do you think that makes me feel?" Didn't confront her. . . just went to my car and finished off Jack's donut holes he didn't eat that morning. : )  I mean, really?? Do you not remember that at 12 weeks your baby is the size of a lime?? The bigness is not from my 3 inch child growing inside of me. It's just not polite and I sincerely apologize if I have EVER made a tacky comment to another mother out there like that. I feel like I make a big effort to try to make people feel good about themselves---and it isn't really that hard! 


No cute pictures to share today, just a little venting. We get to find out the first week of September if we're having a girl or a boy! Makes being a little on the chunky side SO worth it! Have a great week!

12 comments:

shawnadesigns said...

i bet you are BEAUTIFUL with your little 12 week lemon! :) i totally agree with your comments. i have a friend who actually weighed LESS the day after she delivered than she did the day she conceived... hate her!!!

Thompson crew said...

People really can be so insensitive!! I'm sure you look great.....so many people say so many crazy things to pregnant women. You have every right to vent on that one! :)

angela said...

I guess you can be thankful that at least you look pregnant. When I got pregnant with my third that quickly, I just looked fat. I felt like I had to tell others all the time that I was pregnant, as sort of an excuse for the chub :) I'm with you though, why do others have to be so thoughtless sometimes.

Angie said...

Shameful.
If I had been there, I would have knocked her out for you. Plain and simple. Nobody makes my Shelma feel bad.

Courtney said...

Give me a break. Find someone who has had four children in four years and looks as beautiful as you do and she, and only she, can say anything to you. I think you get more beautiful every year and with every baby!

A Team said...

YOU ARE PRECIOUS and your body is giving LIFE to a precious baby!
PRAISE GOD for WEIGHT!

Remember... I gained 70 pounds with my FIRST! haha... it was all fun and donuts the next 2 times and with our adoption... I ate while I waited!
It comes off!! Just enjoy it while it last!!!
Tracie:-)

mindy said...

I am so sorry someone was so impolitely bold with you! You are one of the sweetest people I have ever met in my life. Speaking without thinking...such a bad habit! I have experienced something similar to this when people ask about Christine and I tell them and they say "WHAT'S WRONG WITH HER? WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?" Well, if we knew that, maybe she could live a "normal life" and get to enjoy her babies and do all those things she loves to do. People just don't think about what they are saying, sometimes! Anyway...you just stick that belly out and walk proudly. You are growing a child of God in there!
Hugs to all!

daughteroftheking said...

It was great to see you this weekend Shelly!
It does amaze me that a women would say something like that. You kind of expect comments like that from a man who doesn't really know. I do have to say an uncle once said something to that effect to me and I was not nearly as gracious as you!
You look great girl!

Kendra said...

This one made me giggle . . .just because I'm always amazed at what comes out of some people's mouths. Unbelievable!! I'm sure you are absolutely PRECIOUS, and I know your little "lime" is loving being snug in mommy's tummy. Eat those donut holes and just enjoy your second trimester - fog is lifted, I hope?!? Blessings on you and all your sweet ones -

Kylie said...

Oh Shelly,
I saw you last week and you look GREAT! Don't let anyone make you feel any different. Eat up girl, nothing like cleaning the plates of our children :) Hope you continue to feel good, have a great week! HOpe to see Hayley onThurs.

Shelley said...

I loved your venting today! I wish I would have had a blog to vent on when I was prego. I am sure you look adorable. I am not a super human woman who sheds the weight either and I had got pregnant with my third when my second was only 5 months old and my first was just a bit over two. I FEEL YOUR PAIN! Hang in there...Cant wait to hear if it is a girl or boy! SO EXCITING. Enjoy this time... You're beautiful!

Betsy said...

I just have to say I can definitely relate here. I am pregnant for the second time and this baby was conceived when my daughter was 2 1/2 months old so I definitely have my share of previous baby weight! We definitely have a head start on showing! But the end is so worth it!